Well, hello there My, it’s been a long, long time How am I doin’? Oh, well, I guess I’m doin’ fine It’s been so long now and it seems that It was only yesterday Mmm, ain’t it funny how time slips away?
Hello Blog, how you been?
I’ve been doing fine, what a year its been?
Covid? What Covid? I’ve been mainly working from home and only recently starting to get out to play again.
To be honest, working from home beats the daily commute to Edinburgh, do I miss my colleagues .. Err .. Nope! 🙂
Hows the love life?
Well been a bit of a year on that front too, ups, down, stories to tell which will remain untold .. maybe / mostly.
Life is an experience, I’m sure you agree, I’m looking forward to writing some stories again .. its cathartic .. but what do we write about? .. mainly experienced based I supplose .. good and bad .. the joy and the pain.
Talking of joy, I’m now the proud Grandad of a 5 month old baby girl. Leah. she’s beautiful and I couldn’t be prouder.
5 months already, healthy, alert, getting bigger, more responsive and aware of her surroundings.
Today was one of my best mates Alex’s funeral, a very different affair in these days of crisis and coronavirus with limited numbers allowed in the crematorium and no purvey in a local pub or club afterwards.
Alex was one of the best, an outgoing, gregarious character, intelligent, charming and with a biting wit which he used to wind up opponents at work, on the football pitch and in the terraces.
He was a semi-pro footballer before we worked together in IT, clicked instantly and he played football with my group of pals for a few years were his class always showed.
He loved karaoke and would sing on any occasion. Both of us love dancing and I wish that I had half his confidence in just getting on the flor on his own when a song played that he liked. He usually dragged me up tho, even although i love dancing, getting up on my own isn’t really my thing.
Today, around 100 people outside the crematorium and 25 or so inside including myself, for which I’m very honoured.
The celebrant was the same person that married him and and second wife Laura 11 years ago, a lovely celebration of the vibrant life of a colourful charactter and complete gentleman.
His passing last week was very sudden and came as a shock and I’m not ashamed to tell you that I had more than a few tears for him.
I’m going to miss my pal very much.
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The funeral was on the other side of Glasgow, so after paying respect to Laura and the family and friends, I stopped in at my dads on the way home.
He’s 85 and has been in serious lockdown for the past 16 weeks as he knows himself that if he gets this virus then its game over and contact is limited between his carers, my brother Duncan and myself.
We sat chatting about life, watching the tv that he watches, usually series and movies created before I was even a glint in his eyes. But its what he likes and I was happy just to be in his presence and listen to his stories of Glasgow and the mischief he got up to as a kid.
Someday, and hopefully that day isn’t anytime soon, I’ll be the paying tribute to him, as I did for my mum, only this time i won’t have dad looking up at me with pride.
So while he’s here, I’ll celebrate the living.
You should do the same, it’s too late when their gone.
Check that pic of my 3 kids taken on the morning of the Millennium, Laura is now 28, Claire 22 and Steven 30. All summer babies.
Happy days.
Things have changed in the past almost 20 years. I was divorced a few years later and they’ve grown up, All young graduates and my elder two are established in their careers and living with their partners.
A couple of weeks ago, I mentioned on here how pleased I was for my munchkin, Claire 22, to graduate and get a new job.
The only problem is that the new job is down south at one of the major banks. Thankfully its not London based, but it is a fantastic opportunity and carries an amazing starting salary.
I’m absolutely delighted for her.
But here’s the thing .. I’m somehow sad, not for her or them .. I’m delighted .. that doesn’t change. But its as if somehow its an end of an era and my purpose and usefulness has come to an end.
That’s rubbish really .. I know it .. You know it.
But its overwhelming.
I find myself making tea in the morning, knowing that she’s still asleep in bed, knowing that she’s safe and thinking next week, I’m on my own.
We had dinner last week and her brother and sister wrote beautiful messages on the good-luck cards they have her .. Their as proud as I am ,, but without the angst.
Tomorrow I drive her down south, she’s going to be living with her boyfriends parents.
I’m looking forward to meeting them and I’m pleased that she’s not going to a flat. Moving house and starting a new job in a new city is stressful enough never mind living in another unknown place.
A 6 hour drive from Glasgow and it will be like driving her down the aisle. Giving her away to a new life.
Yeah pathetic I know.
She says she’ll be back every few weeks and she’s already planned to be back on the 14th.
But how long will that last?
Indefinitely she says, her life is up her, she says.
And I want to believe her, even although she’s starting a new life down there.
I hear my inner voice saying, part of being a parent is you need to let them fly, you’ve done a good job, provided for them and gave them the tools to fly and now they are living their own lives.
It’s my proudest achievement seeing them get on in life.
But despite my brain over-ruling my heart, knowing it makes sense, it still hurts.
Jeez, I’ve had my moments of heartache or even heartbreak before.
But nothing, no nothing, compares to this.
Tomorrow her boyfriends parents kindly offered if i’d like to stay at theirs. But I booked a hotel to save any inconvenience. I’m genuinely looking forward to meeting them and going for dinner on Saturday night.
No doubt that there will be sad good-byes on Sunday before the drive back north to Glasgow.
No doubt that I’ll be choked but will try and keep a smile on my face.
On the positive site, next week, an empty nest .. I can sit about in my pants .. play my music or piano as loud as a like at any time of day or night.
It’s time to take the parental gloves off and get back to living a single life.
Give it a couple of years, the grand-kids will be here and I’m quitting this working for a living malarkey.
Bring it on!! 🙂
Sunday at 12pm, Celtic are playing Rangers at Ibrox, I may be driving up the road or might watch it down south then head for home.
I hope there aren’t any more tears on that long drive up the road.
Well it’s finally happened, My kids are all growing up and leaving me to start life’s of their own.
Laura 28 left first, just over a year ago, buying a house with her partner. She called me last night to tell me they are getting married next year. I’m delighted for them both.
Steven 30 leaves this weekend, moving into rented accommodation with his partner. They’ll be buying soon but giving it a try first
Both of these were expected.
What wasn’t expected is that my munchkin Claire 21 would be moving out so soon.
She recently graduated from Strathclyde with a first class honours degree. I’m very proud of her. Even more so that she has her first job working for a major bank on an amazing starting salary.
A salary that many of my own extended family couldn’t hope to earn despite working for many years.
There’s the proof that education and guidance makes the difference to people’s starts in life.
What wasn’t expected is that she’d be leaving home so soon and moving south to their headquarters.
Coincidentally her boyfriend lives in the same city.
What’s the chances eh??!!
I’m pleased for her but can’t help feeling a bit sad.
This place we live isn’t just a house, it’s home.
Soon I’ll be rattling around in it on my own.
The thought of downsizing crossed my mind, maybe renting it out and using the money to see the world.
But truth be told I’ve seen as much as I want to see with the exception of New York, Vegas, Washington DC and the California coast
I’ve no desire to backpack across Vietnam or experience food poisoning or malaria in less civilised parts of the world.
So what next?
I’ve no idea really, keep working, no mortgage to pay so just enjoy life.
Truth be told, I think it’s time I found a new partner and settled down.
Life’s too short and too precious to live it on your own.
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2am on Monday morning. This new job comes with bank holidays.
But if truth be told I’m not convinced if being staff rather than self employed is for me.
Especially with a daughter getting married next year!
A private ward on the 11th floor of the new Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Glasgow, fantastic views out the window looking north to the Campsie Hills then Ben Lomond and the Arrochar Alps beyond.
Not that he was in any state to admire the vista, he had more important priorities having just came through a kidney removal.
His wife and daughter had already been and gone, leaving him resting, recovering from the effects of the anaesthetic.
I waited outside the room, I didn’t want to go in, wake him or even chat to him. It didn’t seem appropriate. I just wanted to see him.
I just wanted to know that he was alive and well and that he was on the way back and over the trauma of the operation.
I can see him through the glass of the door, head back, propped up on pillows, eyes closed, mouth slightly open.
That was enough for me, maybe a quick chat with his nurse and get his status, then head for home.
At that she appeared, Nurse Aboui, small, slim, black as the ace of spades, afro hair and a dazzling smile as she offers her greeting. Continue reading “He Ain’t Heavy ..”→
Well she actually said, “Fuck Off” .. delightful I’m sure! 🙂
It’s not that I haven’t said the same thing to her before, because I have, even although I didn’t mean it.
It was more a “Seriously?” than a “Get out of here”.
Where as hers was more a ” Get out of here asap and never come back” 🙂
But the big difference is, somewhere inside, this time I knew she meant it.
This time I thought, you really are pissed off with me.
What is it that I do to make piss her off so much?
How can I simply be out with friends and family enjoying the day, then get a rattling angry text from her.
Truth is, I was enjoying spending time with my closest brother before he goes through a major operation, enjoying the football, the sunshine and his last few days of freedom before going under the knife with life changing results and I don’t even want to think about the worst case scenario.
So we got caught up, I hadn’t contacted her until 8:30, but it was only 8:30 for fucks sake, hardly the end of the night.
Yeah, maybe I should have contacted her earlier to finalise arrangements, let her plan ahead, I get that, but it takes 2 to tango, does it not?
So what next?
Let it go?
Apologise?
Look for some middle-ground between eating humble pie and maintaining a huff.
You know I miss her, she knows I miss her, I know that she’s hurting, probably waiting on a call .. or maybe not.
Here’s the truth, good-bye isn’t always a one-sided decision and fuck off isn’t always the end.
We’ve came this far and its a lot to throw away for trivial reasons.
Anyway, my closest brother is genuinely under the knife today, they found a 4cm long tumour in one of his kidneys and are removing the kidney completely.
Only this time last week, we met for a curry and some beers before going to see Bryan Ferry at The Royal concert Hall in Glasgow. He’d only just heard the bad news.
He’s a different kind of character to me, he’s more “get it done” where I’d be worried sick.
But you’ve really got to love the NHS for taking care of business so quickly.
So it might not be perfect, budgets are limited, but when you need it, it’s there.
Last night, I went over to see him .. strange thing .. I don’t see him every week, we aren’t in constant contact, but he’s my oldest friend, a close confidante, I just can’t imagine him not being around.
Right now, waiting on the news from the hospital, it’s a strange situation, a pregnant pause, when life is out of your hands, big things are happening and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about them.
I’m not really religious, but I will admit to having said a silent prayer.
I’m a Celtic fan, It’s part of who I am. I can’t remember being anything else.
Even in those dark days of divorce, I’d find myself at Celtic Park surrounded by fellow fans and thinking no matter how bad things get, I’ll always have this and at least I’ll never be a hun. 🙂
Celtic has been not only part of my life but also my sons. In those dark days it was the glue that bonded us bhoys together. Him aged 5 sitting on my knee eating pizza, the seat beside us empty. The guys around us patting his head and giving him sweets.
20 odd years later, we’re still in the same seats in the Jock Stein Stand with the same guys sitting around us.
Part of my legacy with my Bhoy is that I’ll pay the season tickets until I’m not working then he’ll take the mantle and hopefully grandkids will fill that empty seat.
Today Celtic play Hibs at Easter road with a beam back to the Kerrydale suite at Celtic Park. A few of our fellow fans are meeting for a beer and to watch the game together.
It’ll be a bit different to talking to the backs of their heads.
If we win then that’s the league wrapped up for the seventh year in a row and a win against Motherwell at Hampden in May and that’s a historic second Treble in a row.
Would you bet against it?
I wouldn’t.
If you’ve read any of my nonsense, you’ll know I like an occasional flutter, but only really like to bet certainties and put enough on that the return is worthwhile.
Earlier in the week I contacted Ladbrokes for the odds of Celtic winning 10 league titles in a row.
As you can see from the response above it’s not a risk they are willing to take. I.e In their opinion Celtic will go on to win the 10 titles in a row.
Got to agree with them.
Enjoy your day, these are the good days. These are days to celebrate and remember.
If you do then you’re probably female and an idiot and too stupid to think past the headlines.
Still reading?
Good for you, I’m glad you’re still with me and my flippancy hasn’t made you run away like a cry baby.
Even more so if you’re female, I’m glad you stayed. You’ve got balls! 🙂
Let me explain why there is no gender pay gap for the hard of understanding.
Firstly, to pay men and woman different rates for the same job is illegal in most of the civilised world and has been in the UK since 1970 and the US since 1963.
Secondly, although it’s true in the statistics published yesterday, see link below, which provides details of the differences in mean and median pay between male and female employees, The reason that there is a difference is because of the roles that each gender is predominantly employed in with males having more senior or higher paid technical roles.
So let me condense that for you. There is no gender pay gap, Any comparison is invalid because you are comparing apples with oranges.
The difference in mean or median earnings is because women are underrepresented in the higher paid roles, That can’t be solved by employing people based on gender because higher paid roles are based on ability and education, not gender.
Note that employing people based on gender is also illegal.
That difference in education and ability between individuals paid higher or lower rates regardless of gender comes down to personal choice, effort and ability.
Am I saying that women are less capable than men?
Are you fucking mad? Of course not.
As a father of a son and two daughters, I’d never under underestimate the capabilities of my daughters, quite the opposite, my goal is to help educate them academically and in the school of life so that they succeed in their chosen careers.
After that it comes down to their choice and if they choose a lower paying position, then it’s not because they are less capable, It’s because that’s the choices they made.
Condensing and generalising that …
Hard or in demand degree = Maths, IT, Accountancy, Medicine. Law, Engineering = Well paid career.
Easy or less in demand Degree = Media studies, social science, history = low paid job.
Apprenticeship = Decent income based on ability particularly if self employed.
No education = it’s not the end, but it’s not going to be easy.
As I explained to my kids, it’s their choice, but there are long term consequences.
Of course education isn’t everything, there are lots of people making decent bucks without a degree, skilled plasterers, plumbers, builders, salespeople. People earning because of their individual abilities. Not bleating about invalid comparisons because they didn’t make an effort.
Let’s imagine a man is in a low paid job, he looks at his company and sees that he’s in the lower quartile, Why is that? It will be most likely because he didn’t try too hard at school, not because he’s got a dick.
But one things for sure, he’ll get on with it and not act like a fucking victim.
Besides, here’s the truth, If you’re not happy with your job and want more pay, ask yourself, how do I do that? Then make the effort and change it. It’s really up to you.
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UK Government data on all companies with over 250 employees
DancingBhoy 