Wolf – 7 – Games

wolf

She’d had enough of my shit.

I get that,  the only irony being that I’d had enough of my shit too.

I’d been a bad boy,  hands up,  I confess to all my sins .. now can we get back to our normal life?    Please? Continue reading “Wolf – 7 – Games”

Wolf – Preface

wolf

A tale of lust,  love and revenge.

A loose follow on to a few of the characters from The Platform Lovers.

Charles is the obvious bad guy,  serial shagger,  now caught and ejected from the family home,   but it has brought him a new found freedom.

But there are other characters who hold darker secrets.

I’ve never written anything really dark and I intend to with this.   You see I don’t always believe that the good guy wins .. that’s not how things work in real life.

Here’s the thing,  I can’t easily get my head around writing about revenge or murder,   it means putting your head in that place,  it’s not how I think.

But we all have a dark side .. right?

That little fascist conniving part of us who would exercise our right to correct any wrongs that have been done against us .. as long as there aren’t any consequences.

If someone seriously wronged you .. and you could kill them without any consequences.

Would you?

How serious would that wrong have to be?

  • Theft?
  • Assault?
  • Rape?
  • Child abuse?
  • The murder a family member?

I think that most people would say that if someone hurt their family,  then they would want to kill them .. but at which point does your NO.. become a YES?

 

Wolf – 3 -Letting Go?

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Did you know that all wisdom is contained in the Godfather?

That it has rules for life that can be applied to almost any situation.

Friends close, enemies closer?

Not letting your emotions affect your judgement?

She was gone.

After four weeks of hibernation, I eventually told my friends and family. I was hurt, broken-hearted and strangely even felt ashamed although I’d done nothing wrong.

I’d had one week of shock, then two weeks of sleepless nights full of vengeful thoughts and what-ifs.

The final week was acceptance, realising that life has to go on, letting go of the most hurtful aspects, resurfacing and moving on .. or at least trying to.

My emotions were almost a classic case of the Kubler-Ross model of dealing with grief and mostly fitted the standard grieving process for losing a partner.

Continue reading “Wolf – 3 -Letting Go?”

Wolf – 2 – Hurt

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Young love,   It makes you do crazy things.

Like marry your first girlfriend?

Yes, we were probably married too young,  but that doesn’t excuse her behaviour.

What happened?

She cheated on me obviously.

How long had you been together?

We met aged 18,  she wasn’t the first girl I’d kissed but she was the first girl I had sex with.

Why did you get married?

Because we were stupid,  full of the joys of youth and madly in lust with each other.

But that’s not a reason to get married so young?

Yes I know,  I just couldn’t believe that I’d met a girl as gorgeous as her who wanted to be with me.   I didn’t think that I’d meet any one better and after a few months we moved in together then after a year we made it official.

Were you happy?

Actually,  I was.    But my parents weren’t.   My dad had a quiet word with me and said I should be setting up on my own and playing the field for a while before settling down.

Do you think that you should have listened to him?

Obviously,  but that’s easy in hindsight,  at the time we couldn’t keep our hands off each other.

When did it start to go wrong?

It didn’t,  or if it did,  I wasn’t aware that it was.     That’s the thing,  you can’t read other people’s minds,  they can be deceitful and you never know until it’s too late.

How did matters come to a head?   Continue reading “Wolf – 2 – Hurt”

Wolf – 1 – Free!

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It was just sex!

No really I swear to you, it meant absolutely nothing.

Well maybe a bit of ego scratching on my part but it was all just a bit of fun and I never meant to hurt anybody.

Yes I know I was married at the time, but you know all about that, I was frustrated and felt neglected, she was always tired and spent more time with the kids than me.

Because sex never happened, or when it did it was dull and functional rather than exciting.

So I took my desires elsewhere.

I honestly didn’t mean to hurt anyone or break up the marriage.

The videos?

They were just souvenirs, harmless bits of fun, for a bit of solo ego-scratching at a future date .. no harm done, it wasn’t as if I was going to broadcast them.

Yes I was wrong to take them secretly, well most of them, some of the girls were quite happy to perform in front of camera. Take Susie for example, she loves it, in fact she has copies of her own.

Moira?

Of course Moira doesn’t know … what you don’t know doesn’t hurt you .. right?

I mean what’s the point in raking up old news now?

I’ve already said that I was wrong .. I accept that, I’ve already apologised, I don’t know why people are still making such a big fuss about it.

It wasn’t as if anyone was actually hurt.

Was it?

Continue reading “Wolf – 1 – Free!”

When Love Runs Dry? – Tempted?

WhenLoveRunsDry

6 inches and a million miles between them.

You can almost taste the venom in her stare.

So what happened?

Did he call it off or her?

A public embarrassment at this function perhaps?

Whatever has happened, She hates him.

But is it because she has had enough of the relationship or because of what he’s done?

He looks as if he has stated his case and got it off his chest, possibly apologised. But is now resigned to his fate as she has made her decision.

I like it because it’s typical Jack glamour with a twist.

We’ve all been there. 🙂

When Love Runs Dry – A painting by Jack Vettriano,  I’m a big fan,  he once laughingly called me a “Dirty Bastard” of which I”m proud!

That story is on here somewhere.

Tonight Squeeze play The Glasgow Royal Concert Hall.

I’m looking forward to all their classics,  particularly Tempted originally sang with Paul Carrack.

Maybe the pic inspired the lyric.

Tempted by the fruit of another
Tempted but the truth is discovered!

Hell Hath No Fury?

Hell, hell, yet I’ll be calm.
Now the dawn begins
And so hand of fate is stretched to draw the vale and leave thee bare.
Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned
No hell a fury like the woman, scorned.

William Congreve – The Mourning Bride

The quote above often wrongly attributed to Shakespeare is used as the closing lines from the first episode of the recent BBC drama Doctor Foster starring the beautiful Suranne Jones in the title role as the woman cheated by her husband.

At first,  after she spots a blonde hair on her husbands scarf,  her mind us full of paranoia,  that knot in her tummy, natural overreaction,  suspecting his newly blonde assistant,  their friends.

When the opportunity presents herself, she checks his phone but finds nothing.

But the doubt doesn’t stop as she bumps in to his assistant at the school gates who tells her that her husband usually leaves at 5 and she locks up the office every day.

The next day,  she leaves work early,  parking outside his office,  then following him,  as he picks up flowers,  hoping to catch him with the other woman only to find him visiting his mother at her care home.

She’s obviously feeling guilty and its written all over his face,  which he notices.

They have a private chat away from his mother and she confesses that she was suspicious and followed him.

How stupid of her ..

Stupid for showing her hand too soon,  stupid for following him,  wasting that time when there are so many other checks she should have done without the chance of being spotted.

Continue reading “Hell Hath No Fury?”

The Platform Lovers – Savages?

Charles was showing Alistair his phone.

A photograph of Monica dressed in red,  more than a little cleavage on display.

Her red glossy lipstick in contrast with her lightly tanned skin and jet black hair.

“Niiiiccce” .. Alistair hissed a rather lame description of this particularly attractive vibrant woman as he sipped on his beer.

“Nice?   You are wrong there my friend,  She is fucking gorgeous .. I  just wouldn’t get fed up fucking the brains out of that.”

Don’t you hate how some men refer to women as “that”?

The objectification of women .. you’ve read the blurb from all the usual suppliers,  Women’s Lib,  Anti-Porn Campaigners.

Here’s the thing that they miss.
Continue reading “The Platform Lovers – Savages?”

More Strong Independent Capable #Women?

I don’t know if you  noticed it but “Clare’s Law”,  the Domestic Abuse Disclosure Scheme came into operation across the whole of Scotland yesterday. 

This scheme gives a partner or third party concerned about a friend or relative,  the right to apply for disclosure of their partners suspected history of domestic abuse or violent behaviour. 
In the six months of its trial period, there were 59 applications of which 22 resulted in disclosure.    

An indication that the majority of cases have 37 from 59 have no abusive history to disclose despite having suspicions. 

That doesn’t make them abusive,  or clear them,  it just means there is nothing to report. 

Either that or the person being reported is not actually abusive but the person applying may have their own malicious reasons to apply, possibly a third party trying to put the mix in. 

Unrealistic?  I don’t think so,  the pettiness, maliciousness and self interest of people never ceases to amaze me. 

Despite that,  having been on the receiving end of domestic abuse,  I’m all for disclosure,  it can only be a good thing.    If it saves one unfortunate soul then it’s fine it’s job. 

As a guy experiencing it,  it goes unreported because what guy would report it?    

You walk away.  Simple. 

Reporting it would only seem petty and result in lies and counter claims trying to justify the unjustifiable.   

It’s easier just to walk away particularly when you are capable of standing on your own two feet and have no ongoing dependency on the abuser. 

But here’s what I’m wondering,  at which point should a person have the right to pry into someone else’s, a partners background?

Define partner?   

Such a vague term,  clearly not someone you met last week,  so should that be based on the duration of the relationship?   

Or on the level of commitment?   I wouldn’t think you’d have to be living together to have concerns.  

Personally I think that it should it be because the person suspected of previous domestic abuse has demonstrated some dubious behaviour?
But if they have demonstrated dubious behaviour,  do you really need to apply for their history?

What if the person has no history to disclose?  

Does that make their behaviour any more acceptable?

Wouldn’t it be better just to get out of the relationship at the first sign of jealousy, controlling behaviour and/or verbal or physical abuse?

Okay,  that’s the ideal,  but it doesn’t really work like that does it?  

Hindsight is a wonderful thing and if you’ve been in that kind of relationship,  then the one thing you know for certain is that  you wish you’d got out earlier in the relationship as the warning signs were there. 

How many times have you seen a friend in a long term relationship were they can’t be themselves because of a controlling or jealous partner? 

You listen to their stories and you’d like them out of it,  but they don’t leave,  either through fear of the consequences, fear of being alone or because they have emotional and financial commitments with that person, children, house, mortgage, financial dependence. 

Having listened to people’s stories over the years,  women in particular will put up with some amount of crap from an abusive or controlling partner because they’ve bought into the situation,  had kids,  it’s about more than them. 

If that’s the case the person doesn’t need disclosure,  they already know. 

What they need is support from friends, family and social services. 

In the longer term, If we take it as a given that unfortunately most perpetrators of domestic abuse are men,  then what we need is strong women who will not tolerate that behaviour and avoid being in a dependent situation by having their own career and income. 

Strong, independent, capable women that’s what I like and want my girls to be. 

If they happen to have a man in their life’s then it’s because they choose them,  because they want them, not because they need them. 
Background Info 

http://www.heraldscotland.com/mobile/news/home-news/scots-can-ask-if-partner-has-history-of-domestic-abuse-as-clares-law-is-rolled-out.1435744749

http://www.scotland.police.uk/whats-happening/news/2015/july/national-roll-out-of-domestic-abuse-disclosure-scheme-announced

Application form

https://www.scotland.police.uk/secureforms/disclosure/