And then the weirdest thing happened … #humour

It’s Friday,  finishing slightly early from work at 430 and I have the bright idea to pop into a barbers near the station in town for a quick trim.

This would save me going down to my local barbers who close at noon on a Saturday and I might struggle as I’m out drinking on Friday night.

I’d passed this place a couple of times and it was always empty,  probably because it’s up a side-street and looks a little dingey.

So I get in and there are two male barbers sitting chatting and no customers.

They look up from their conversation but don’t stand up.

“Can I have a trim please”

“Do you have an appointment?”

“No” but I’m thinking there’s no one here,  why are you asking.

“Sorry but we only deal with appointments”

So I leave thinking .. good business model mate,  turning away work when you have no customers.   No wonder your shop is even dingier than it looks from the outside.

Continue reading “And then the weirdest thing happened … #humour”

Work Stories – Species?

So I’m working with this girl ..

Well I’m not .. 

But she is working in the same area as me, 3 banks of desks forward and one bank over.

She’s about 25 years of age, pretty face, long dark hair, 6’4 in her heels, exceptionally tall, shapely, perky boobs in her wonder-bra, and a lovely round bottom, which is accentuated by the fact that she has a very slim waist that exagerates her long undulating curvature.

Are you drooling yet?

Well all us guys in the office are!

Sometimes as she’s walking I notice that I’m not the only guy looking and if she passes, heads turn.

If you’re a girl .. I wonder if you are a little bit jealous?

Today, she’s wearing this bright red clingy dress, verging on backless .. Her golden skin looks flawless from neck to just above her waist.

I immediately reassesed my opinion on her wonder-bra .. Nice!

I just happened to be walking behind her ( honest!) and as we approached my desk, there were a few knowing looks and smiles from the boys .. Thinking that I had deliberately chosen to follow her footsteps.

I hadn’t .. Well okay I’d held the door for her as any gentleman would .. But that was merely coincidence!

Anyway, what’s the point of this story?

I dunno .. I kinda forgot!

Oh yeah, the point was ..

Should there be a ban on extremely good looking girls dressing like that and drawing attention to themselves at work?

It’s clearly having a detrimental effect on production as the guys constantly ogle.

Let me answer that for you.

Don’t be so daft . Let the girl wear what she likes .. Nobody here is complaining!

But just so that we can’t be accused of being sexist …

What if this was one of the guys flashing his body?

Who cares .. I don’t look at guys!  🙂

— 

Anyhoo .. Did you hear about the 90 year old guy who shuffled along to his doctor and says,   

Doctor, doctor, last night I had hot passionate sex with this beautiful 25 year old woman.

The doctor says ..

That’s wonderful .. But why are you telling me?

He says .. I’m telling everybody! 🙂

 —

Yeah I know it’s old but kinda fitted.

Right back to the grind!!



Hey Gorgeous …

Hey Gorgeous ,..

Yes you. …

Maybe you’re not feeling 100 percent today,  maybe you’ve looked in the mirror and thought …  Fuck,  is that really me?

But don’t let that mirror fool you. 

That’s just a 2D image of what you are at this moment,  with your hair sticking up and your wrinkles showing under harsh bathroom lighting. 

Just give yourself a little time to scrub up and you’ll look fantastic. 

Besides, the real you,  the 3D walking, talking, dancing, moving, smiling person that you are cannot be captured in mere 2D. 

So learn to appreciate yourself as you are. 

Cos I’ll tell you something .. In 10 years time, you’ll look in the mirror and wish that you look like you do today. 

Enjoy your day gorgeous!  🙂

X

Love this song by Rod Stewart,  very reflective in his old age but can still put out a tune!

Train Stories – Blondes?

I’m at Bathgate on the way to Edinburgh.

The train door opens and 6 women get on and fill the seats around me. 

All of the women are attractive, ranging from fairly to very.  

I summed that up in half a nano-second, my brain putting them in some sort of order.

Wid ye?

Aye!

It’s a guy thing. 

It happens without even thinking about it. 

If you have any questions,  just ask the man in your life!

The women are not together,  travelling separately but what’s interesting is that although they don’t look alike,  they do look like clones made from a pattern. 

Each of them is in their early 40s to early 50s,  has dyed dark brown hair of varying shades, some are professionally done and some look like home kits

Having two daughters,  one of whom recently had an estimate from a quality salon of 150 pounds for a cut and colour I have some idea of how much women are charged these days,  

Pretty outrageous if you’re having to pay that amount of cash every few months.

No wonder some of the gals are using home-kits .. Even for just the occasional root touch up.

I’d imagine that this variety in hairstyles  is related to their individual income and circumstances. 

Their dress styles reflect that presumption,  even although they are all wearing similar business wear,  the quality and newness of their garb is in keeping with their hair style. 

Two are pretty mumsie, one in particular is pretty hot,  tall, slim, shapely,  but probably too thin .. If you’re asking!

It would be fair to say that they’d all fit into that dubious category of MILF.

If you pardon the expression!  

Not something I’d ever say,  but it’s an an honest compliment even if it is somewhat basic and animalistic.

But looking at the gals,  a thought crossed my mind .. Where are all the blondes?

There just doesn’t seem to be as many around as there used to be.

At work,  there are a few blondes,  girls who look like they have that natural colouring are staying blonde,  but the rest,  instead of faking the blonde are sticking with their natural brunette.

Even if that’s artificially enhanced.

With the number of girls dyeing their hair blonde decreasing,  I wonder do blondes still have more fun?

Personally, I’ve never thought hair colour was important to the amount of fun you have.

Sharon Stone  vs Kelly Brook

Err .. Both!

— 

Blonde or brunette?

Girls just wanna have fun!


Age, Attitude and Acceptance!

Do you know the definition of being middle-aged?

It’s not when a woman gets to a certain age and her body changes and she either tries to dress younger or lets herself go.

it’s not when a guy buys a sports car,  and starts chasing younger women or gives up on that and lets himself go.

With that letting go,  both genders are accepting the aging process,  not trying to be something they are not.

But in letting go of themselves, people do themselves a dis-service.

Why not try and make the most of yourself,  keep fit,  wear clothes that you like,  but nothing too trendy or you look ridiculous.

I don’t believe that bullshit that age is just a number and attitude is everything.

Age comes whether you try to hold it off or not,  it’s going to happen,  so get used to the idea but don’t give up.

I’m quite fit,  I try to eat reasonably healthy,  but I can’t play football the way I used to.  I’m nowhere near as fit or as fast as in my 20s.

You can’t lie to yourself about that.

It happens … accept it ..  deal with it .. and don’t give up .. that’s when the attitude comes in.

Attitude to face the facts of life and get on with it.

But that’s only the mental and physical side.

Let me tell you the real definition of being middle-aged.

Continue reading “Age, Attitude and Acceptance!”