Blind-Sided – 11 – Choices?

Ellen Barkin

“Let’s go to bed” She said

And you’re wondering what’s going on?

One minute it’s all systems go, then there’s a straight red because of her time of month.. Now she wants to go to bed with you?

Talk about mixed messages?

You’re asking yourself .. What was the point and thinking of making excuses, cutting your losses and heading for home.

It’s late and you’re tired and you’re not sure if you can be bothered with any more of the games.

What’s the point in playing the game when you can’t score a goal?

The best you can hope for is …

Well that depends on what you were hoping for. There were no promises only presumptions on your part.

So why did she make her play for you, bring you here, when she’s known all along that sex wasn’t going to happen?

Because ..

A – She likes you and she might have sex if the timing was different?
B – She just wanted the attention and some affection particularly after her recent marriage breakup.
C – She’s a cock teaser and enjoys stringing guys along?
D – A combination of the above?

Let me tell you how it is.

No girl is desperate or manipulative enough to be a cock teaser, lead you on, bring you home and then shut that door on you just to boost her ego.

A girl in a club wanting a snog then going home with her pals?

Yes that happens, count yourself lucky and hopefully you got her number.

She’s probably quite right to go home with her friends rather than an iunknown stranger . thats you.

But no woman brings a stranger home just to play mind games.

So forget option C and if you even remotely thought that was a possibility then you really need some education and attitude adjustment.

Any woman going to the clubs can pull a guy,   if she’s even half-way attractive then she’s probably inundated with guys checking if she’s interested or available and even more so if she’s as good looking as the girl you’ve met tonight

Girls have that choice, more than men ever do. They’ve dealt with all sorts of guys over the years, nice guys, scumbags, scumbags pretending to be nice guys.

It’s all part of the game of love, but no girl brings a stranger home just to play games.

I’d go with a combination of A and B.

She obviously likes you, finds you attractive, enjoys you’re company, the fact that she doesn’t want sex at the moment is irrelevant. That was never on the table and if you think it was then you’ve made some bad presumptions.

She’s probably needing some reassurance that she’s still attractive after her separation.

Most women do, some go off the rails for a little while, putting their usual moral standards on hold as they seek the reassurance they need, usually in clubs or on dating sites.

A marriage breakdown can be devastating for both men and women, particularly if it wasn’t their choice and more so if it came as a surprise and if there was third party involvement.

Third party involvement only complicates a relationship which was clearly already messed up when one party started looking elsewhere.

I generalise but that tends to be more of a guy-thing, playing the field when out with their mates, looking for a bit of fun.

But it happens with women too, particularly if they are in an unhappy relationship.

Been there, been on the dating sites and the clubs, met Miss RightNow and her sisters Miss NoChance and Miss Absolutely, some times but very rarely that Miss Single is really a Mrs SomeoneElse.

Once upon a time taking her back to mine then later taking her home and getting some bullshit story about stopping at the end of the block, then seeing a male hand opening the door for her at 6am.

Everyone has a story and a reason for what they do, where they are in life and what brought them to this moment.

Life can be confusing, it’s rarely straightforward except when you’re very young. Young people have ideals, some get damaged by life’s journey. Hopefully it works out for them.

Some people play the dating game, looking for fun and no commitment.

But that’s transient, eventually you get fed up with the game, bored with it and wants something more permanent.

Some people still want the fairy tale. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just more difficult when you’re older and both have circumstances possibly a little damaged even although you’d never admit it.

The reality is that we are all damaged to some extent, even if we don’t accept that. The choices we make today are based on our past experiences particularly the ones that have deeply affected us.

As you play the game, meet new people, hopefully you meet someone who helps you grow and flourish and who accepts your past and you do the same for them because life is so much better with them in your life than without them.

At this moment, she’s got her head against yours waiting on a response.

Go to bed and see what happens or make a petulant excuse, cut your losses and go home.

Thing is you might not really know this girl, but she likes you and you like her.

Sometimes you need to appreciate when you’re lucky and just go with the flow.

What’s the worst thing that could happen? 🙂

 

Friday again,  I’ve been baby-sitting my cousins dog all week,  a trial for my daughter who keeps telling me that she wants us to get one.

I’ve never had a dog before and I’m fairly open to the idea .. mostly.

Claire and Laura were at Beyonce and had a ball last night,  me and the mutt went a long walk around the local woodland,    she did her business somewhere in the long grass.

We went home and sat in the back garden to cool down.  The dog sniffed all over the edges towards teh woodland behind then did its business right in the middle of the lawn.

We had words!

So .. I like the idea of a dog,   but do I want to do the poop-scoop thing?

No,  I don’t.

I mean really, it is wrong to have animals defacting all voer the streets,  but how can anyone stand to bag the stuff a couple of times per day?

Gives me the boak.

 

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