Blind-Sided – 7 – Amygdala

Ellen Barkin

It’s hard to talk with a tongue in your mouth. 

Don’t you think? 

So let’s cut to the chase, you already have your hand cupping her breast through her dress. 

Her giving you the tongue is a clear green light just in case you hadn’t noticed already. 

Personally, I’m not a fan of tongue play, particularly when some stranger tries to stick theirs down your throat.  

It’s invasive, unnecessary, when all she really has to say is 

“Let’s go to bed” 

Or sone other indirect euphemism for hitting the sack, ripping the sheets, getting naked, down and dirty or whatever. 

Of course, girls very rarely ask so directly. 

As if they need to ask at all!

It’s usually indirectly, particularly on your first time together and their inner morality learned in childhood, that good girls don’t, prevents them from coming straight out and asking …

“Do you want to have sex?”

Or more directly

“Do you want to fuck?”

Stupid question really … What guy doesn’t?  

Errrr … No you’re okay, I’m not like that … Oh well .. Okay then … Since its you!  

As the guy tries to pretend the girl is special and he’s not just a horny fucker like every other guy on the planet.  

Cos he’s different!

Did you fall for that?

How many times before you wised up?

But you know now right?

Maybe I’m being harsh …

Of course there are good guys out there,   as well as some not so good guys and some out and out rats. 

But there are very few guys who aren’t going to take up the offer of sex when it’s put on a plate. 

Particularly with a good looking woman, that would be going against a gazillion years of history and genetic programming. 

But what if the girl isn’t that attractive?

The guy has more of a dilemma, an internal cost-benefit decision where he’s already thinking past her and the only thing pushing him towards saying yes is the pressure building in his pants. 

Why fuck a girl that you’re not attracted to?

Why have a one night stand with a girl that you are attracted to?

Answers don’t and don’t. 

The first because it’s wrong for a host of reasons, It’s not fair, morally vacant and apart from a moment of physical relief it’s completely pointless.  

Unless you’re the kind of childish prick who thinks its cool to fuck women that you don’t find attractive, build up their hopes then fuck off to the next girl unfortunate to have your company whilst boasting to your mates about  your exploits?

The second because if you like the girl, find her attractive, want to get naked with her then why not stay and see what develops?

But it’s 3am, you’ve slid the straps of her dress and bra to the side and you’re now kissing and sucking her nipple feeling it stiffen in your mouth.  

Those decisions of physical morality have already been subconsciously made. 

Somewhere deep in your limbic system, the amygdala is kicking down a gear, accelerating the production of testosterone, controlling penile function, blood being directed to your growing erection. 

It’s too late to turn back now. 

Been awake since 5am, would you believe I’ve finally watched 50 shades of Grey .. or rather had it on in the background. 

He really is a damaged individual. 

She must be stupid or at least naive to put up with him.  

All that control and contract nonsense. 

Any woman with any dignity would tell him to fuck right off. 

Don’t get me wrong,  I’m all for a bit of fun,  a bit of tease,  game playing but contracts and pain? 

Can I stop you right there Christian! 

I was bored with the book and only read a few chapters before giving up. 

The film was cringeable, an exercise in style over substance. 

It’s left open for part 2, which I’m sure will arrive as its low production cost will generate high revenue from the masses stimulated by a little erotica. 

Making Changes Sooner Than Later? 

Do you know that how your life turns out is really all down to you?

Good choices and bad choices at various stages all contribute to who and what we are today. 

I’m a big fan of education and hard work. 

Neither of these did anyone any harm and personally made a difference for me from working as an engineer in shipbuilding to designing systems for a bank   

This brought financial rewards,  but as I’m sure you know life isn’t all about work and money. 

In fact never be a slave to either of these fake gods. 

Spending too much time at work is to the detriment of your real life and time with friends and family. 

Similarly focusing on money causes people to lose perspective of what’s really important in life. 

A couple of people I know are caught in this trap,  they know the cost of everything but the value of nothing.   

Their life’s are as shallow as this weeks fashion item or must-have gadget. 

Quite sad really. 

The only things we have that are really important is our love and our time and both should be spent wisely. 

My advice,  love people not things and spent time with people you love, who love you back and enhance your life.   

Don’t spent your valuable time with losers,  or people who drain the life out of you.  

What you learn with experience is even if it’s painful,  with hindsight the sooner you make the break the better and the less valuable time you waste on something that’s already fucked. 

That may be  a little idealistic,  as the problem is often that people in a damaging one-sided relationship are too close to see that it’s destructive and holding onto it is only hurting themselves further. 

It’s not necessarily even a love relationship, but any friendship which has became one-sided should be dropped. 

Why did I mention this?

I was with friends at the weekend,  a very one sided relationship,  were he has a great life and she sucks the life out of him and has become steadily worse over the years.  

After the weekends happening I’ve decided that I won’t be in her company again.    That means I won’t be inviting them for dinner at mine. Nothing. I don’t have wasters in my life,  not even by association. 

A bit harsh?

I dont think so.  Read on. 

Truth is I’ve never liked this person and always wondered what she brings to the relationship.  She doesn’t work,  smokes at least 30 a day, drinks heavily and is a walking medicine cabinet,  constantly depressed and moody,  making a scene of herself and adding nothing if any value to their relationship. 

Why would anyone want to hang around with someone like that?

Personally I think it’s a weakness not to have the balls to cut the garbage from your life. 

I’ve been there,  married to an alcoholic and stayed in the relationship longer than I should have for the sake of the children and hoping it would change. 

When somewhere deep down I knew that it wouldn’t.  That they would continue in their spiral of self destruction and drag me down with them until eventually I had to let go. 

That hurts,  divorce is a world of pain emotionally and financially. Even if you are the one who chooses it. 

But hindsight is a wonderful thing and the one thing I know for absolute certainty is the sooner you make the change the better. 

Get your life back,  get your time back and spend it with people who make you happy. 


Not long now til the new series of Game Of Thrones hits the screens. 

What was I saying about getting your life back?   Or death by BoxSet!  🙂