Silly Games … 

She’s in there banging pans
Louder than she needs to
Loud enough to disturb my slumbers
From the couch last night

Fuck off …  I think
Stay or go
Just get fucking on with it
And stop banging my pans

It’s part of the game
Should she stay or
Go
Just fucking go!

Why is she cleaning my kitchen anyway?
Emptying the dishwasher at level 11
She’s somewhere between anger and goodbye
Between stupidity and remorse

I know how she feels
But don’t know why
Stupid words
No reason to argue

She hasn’t opened the door
But I know she’s trying to wake me
Seeking attention assurance forgiveness
An outlet for her anger?
But I can’t be bothered

I close my eyes and pretend to sleep
But even pretence doesn’t come easy
Should I go in there
Comfort or confront?

She started it .. Honestly
You know she’d say the same
Bitching to her friends
Accentuating the negative
But I really can’t be arsed

She’s a proud woman
Too proud to beg
Too determined to desist
Caught between walking away
And admitting fault
Been there
I’ve played that game before
Can’t be arsed now

What does she want?
Another fight?
Round 2?
An apology?
For me to hold her
And tell her everything’s okay?
When it’s not?

Should I go in there
Guns blazing
Tell her how it is?
Some home truths?

Do I want that?
Maybe
Maybe not
Maybe I’d win
But lose everything

Seconds out …
She’s fixing cutlery
As I enter the room
She doesn’t look up
Not even when I say
Good morning

Must be serious!

What does she want?
Not tea either apparently
I watch her as the kettle boils
She looks the other way
But I can feel her peripheral stare
As she goes to the fridge
She’s making a show of ignoring me
So obviously

She’s very attractive when she’s angry
Jaw set,  mouth pursed
Cheekbones high
She knows I’m watching her
I don’t hide it

I want to fuck her right now
To wash away the anger
With passion and love
But that would be wrong.

This is so fucking stupid
I know she wants my attention
My affection
So why not just get on with it?

What does she want?

“I’m sorry”

I hear someone say
Then realise it was me.

 

Never liked this back in the day … But kinda do now

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