Do you know the definition of being middle-aged?
It’s not when a woman gets to a certain age and her body changes and she either tries to dress younger or lets herself go.
it’s not when a guy buys a sports car, and starts chasing younger women or gives up on that and lets himself go.
With that letting go, both genders are accepting the aging process, not trying to be something they are not.
But in letting go of themselves, people do themselves a dis-service.
Why not try and make the most of yourself, keep fit, wear clothes that you like, but nothing too trendy or you look ridiculous.
I don’t believe that bullshit that age is just a number and attitude is everything.
Age comes whether you try to hold it off or not, it’s going to happen, so get used to the idea but don’t give up.
I’m quite fit, I try to eat reasonably healthy, but I can’t play football the way I used to. I’m nowhere near as fit or as fast as in my 20s.
You can’t lie to yourself about that.
It happens … accept it .. deal with it .. and don’t give up .. that’s when the attitude comes in.
Attitude to face the facts of life and get on with it.
But that’s only the mental and physical side.
Let me tell you the real definition of being middle-aged.
It’s a period of role-reversal when your kids don’t need you as much, but your parents need you more.
The kids have developed, standing on their own two feet and making their own life’s.
Sometimes as a parent it’s tough to let them go, but that’s life, you have to let them fly.
They will look after themselves and if they can’t they’ll come back and you’ll be there to support them.
Meanwhile your parents are fading, they were enjoying retirement, they had their life’s sorted, loved having the grand-kids around or sitting in their clubs with their cronies.
Now our parents are starting to wilt, we see them deteriorate, fading away almost before our eyes.
From personal experience, that can take years, watching them near the end is hard as their bodies give out.
They aren’t that strong capable person that could do anything and we worshipped as a child.
We play our part and go round and make sure they are okay, that they are clean and fed and can get to sleep okay and aren’t in too much pain.
At that time, we know in our hearts that their time is limited, we can’t bear to see them suffer. We wish we could take away their pain.
But after we’ve gone home, they face the night alone .. and they’re afraid.
They’d never admit it, they don’t want to offload their burden on their children. but they’re afraid, the end is night and they know that they cannot hide from it.
I was in that situation with my mum, by the end, she just wanted to go.
Now my dad is somewhere on that road, fighting it, living the life, never giving up .. I’m proud of him.
I discuss this with other friends and family in similar situations, their loved one fading, feeling helpless.
We are helpless, it’s a fact of life .. we have to accept it, by accepting it we deal with the reality instead of wasting effort trying to fight it.
My advice, just be there for them, hold their hand and tell them that you love them, they already know, but it helps when they hear it.
Every night when they go to sleep, not knowing whether they will see the morning, then being disappointed when they do, they will be thankful to know that they are loved and you are there for them.
When that day does come, it’s too late to make amends, so do it now.
If after they have gone, you feel that you could have done better, then the guilt will be unbearable. So be there for them now, while they are here, it’s too late when their gone.
Just be there for them now.
Love this … great song and 2 fab versions
Sam Smith plays Glasgow Sunday and Monday next week
Feeling tempted ..