Online Dating, Love and Sex.

Hello to you,

yesterday, a friend of mine, well if I’m completely honest, someone that I’ve never actually met, not in person, we’ve met online and although we’ve both gave up on online dating, we still have the occasional email conversation.

She’s an interesting person, she has something to say for herself. I like that. She writes too, much more public than I.

We have compared some of our online experiences and she mentioned about men she’s encountered being immature, selfish, egotistical, self-centred.

I would also add desperate, confused, bitter, resentful, promiscous, deceitful to her list, but I’m sure the list could go on.

She can’t believe the way people behave towards other people and finds the manner in which people have treated or been treated by others as astonishing.

I agree with that its the way people treat each other that surprises me, what happened to that “do unto others” parable .. long gone!!

Maybe I’ve been sheltered too long. I was married young, long term relationship with my last girlfriend, which ended because it had ran its course and should have ended sooner.

The irony being that I’m now on my own, completely free and single, I have been online and gave up on it .. why did that happen?

The truth is, I’m quite happy to stay aloof from the dating scene, maybe dabble when I feel like it. But I’m bored with it and focusing on friends, family and the real world. ( And probably this blog, which seems to absorb a lot of my time and effort )

Like a lot of people, I have kids at that inbetween stage, they live at home but do their own thing.

Sitting at home with my daughter of an evening, Not actually with her as she;’s usually upstairs, got her pal in or talking to them online.

So I have a lot of time on my own. I realise that it would be easy to get caught up in the damaging whirlwind of online dating. Wasting too much time waiting on another contact or the next message from someone who is just playing the game, playing the field or has a busy life too.

But I was thinking about her comment and a question entered my mind …

Is online dating .. or even dating in general ..different for men and women?

Are women more likely to get damaged as they can’t seperate sex and love as easily as men?

Call me old fashioned, but I thinks so.

I remember reading once that a guy gives love to get sex and a woman gives sex to get love.

Maybe a bit of a generalisation, but I think that still largely holds true.

Particularly in those early days, were mutual interest is being established. Boundaries are being drawn and broken and waters tested.

It’s a basic fact of life that men will often fake an interest to get into a girls pants, Its deceitful. They know they are doing it .. blaming their genetic programming is merely an excuse.

Do women have that same need to fake an interest to get into a guys pants? I don’t think so .. any women can get a guy anytime .. thats way too easy .. its getting the right guy thats much more difficult.

An interesting discussion.

I’d be interested to hear your thoughts. ( Yes you!! )

On a completely unrelated but almost serendipitous subject.

I’m not the biggest Elton John fan, but had been learning this song on piano and came across it today, the joys of iphone in random mode.

Take care of yourself.


Love Song

The words I have to say
May well be simple but they’re true
Until you give your love
There’s nothing more that we can do

Love is the opening door
Love is what we came here for
No one could offer you more
Do you know what I mean
Have your eyes really seen

You say it’s very hard
To leave behind the life we knew
But there’s no other way
And now it’s really up to you

Love is the key we must turn
Truth is the flame we must burn
Freedom the lesson we must learn
Do you know what I mean
Have your eyes really seen

love song


3 thoughts on “Online Dating, Love and Sex.

  1. An interesting read.
    I instantly thought of sex v’s gender. Sex is what is between the legs and gender is characteristics.
    If you want only sex, then you shall have it, doesn’t matter what sex you are, women can have emotionless sex. However, if a woman is seeking a relationship, then she probably wont be just having sex as she is looking for a connection, this is a gender trait.

    1. I’m glad that you’ve found online dating to be wonderful.

      But you also meet or encounter people that you would never want to meet.

      Generally speaking I’ve enjoyed my experience but it would be wrong to say it has all been successful and it’s wise to be cynical and not trust everyone at face value.

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